The Mental Emotional Health Blog

Well, I have no idea why I got thinking about this subject. But since I was stuck thinking about it, all of my wonderful readers have to endure it too. Thanks for stopping by.

Pick-up lines that probably won’t work:

• If you could just read my mind and see how focused I am on you, you would just, um, let’s see . . . anyway, how are you?
• I’m like a fresh pastry: warm and flaky.
• I’m like a snowmobile: I only go out for part of the year, but I’m usually a lot of fun unless there’s barbed wire.
• I am not like a change machine. What, doesn’t that make cents to you?
• How about I call you next month? I’m just out of minutes right now. Actually, make it three months; I have to start paying off some debt.
• Hi, you’re cute. Let’s get away together, and it’s not like anyone is going to get abducted or anything like that. There won’t be anyone else with us, I don’t think.
• Hey, with all the government bailouts lately, how about you bail me out of my loneliness?
• (When flirting online) I have a face for radio, a voice for newspaper, and a personality for internet anonymity.

 Happy New Year everyone!

I decided to try something new for this entry. For some reason I like to fill out brief questionnaires and polls online. I can read, think for a few seconds, and choose an answer. This is meant to be a little thought-provoking, although this is my first attempt so we’ll see.

So in MentalEmotionalHealth.com fashion, here we go: Decide which of the two choices you would pick if it had to be at the expense of the other. So pick one as if you know you would lose out on the other choice for each topic.

1. Personal - Which do you value more:  Integrity or Charity?
2. Personal - Freedom or Safety?
3. Personal - Which would you prefer: Facing your fears or living within your comfort level?
4. Personal - Which do you value more: Open-mindedness or Being correct?
5. Personal - Would you rather be well-liked or well-respected?
6. Relationships -  Honesty or Consistency?
7. Relationships - What you need or what you want?
8. Relationships - Would you rather have a life-long good friend or be with your soul-mate for 2 years?
9. Spiritual - Which do you value more: Being part of a faith community or Your individual expression of faith?
10. Culture - A world without music or a world without art?
11. Pets - Dogs or cats or other?
12. Iconic Cartoon Characters - Bugs Bunny or Mickey Mouse?

If your ability to trust has been damaged, you might naturally put up personal walls to protect yourself. These walls are good, and necessary in the short-term.

In order to grow as a person as time goes on, though, you must learn how to be vulnerable in some ways (not all ways). Don’t take down all of your protective walls at the same time, or you might be too vulnerable. Take your time, and carefully lower your guard in specific ways when you feel you are ready.  When you find a healthy balance between protecting yourself and being vulnerable enough to grow, you will find you have developed new inner strength.

The most important factor that keeps two people together in a relationship is not communication, trust, or their shared experiences, it is simply this: they both want to be together. When that is established, all other factors are secondary.

This article was featured today on Yahoo, and I always find it interesting to explore gender dynamics. The article is “A Dating Guide For Women: ‘Man Talk’ Translation” by David Wygant, and the link is here: Link

A couple comments about the article:

#4 - A guy saying he needs his space isn’t always a game. Some guys do feel the need to play games, or do the whole chase thing. But sometimes guys want to be less distracted while they figure out if they really like you. It could be a guy is taking a decision about you seriously.

#9 - Yes, he is paying attention to your interests by watching one of your shows by himself and then asking about it. One crucial point though is that this can be temporary. He might watch and ask about your shows while you are getting to know each other, or are in the early stages of being together (which can be years), but once he’s really comfortable in the relationship he might not care as much about your shows. The other crucial point with this is understanding that if a guy stops watching your shows later in the relationship, it doesn’t necessarily mean he has stopped liking or caring about you.